People place their hope on you, So as the kind person you’ve always be, you dare to try, to help, but you failed it. And it become worst to that people, and the blame is on you. Even if the person forgave you, since it is unintentionally done, but still as the person who barely have the confidence, always trying hard no hurt anyone and satisfy everyone, undeniably it’ll make you despise yourself. You’ll feel bad.You’ll feel worthless. And it will not end just like that, it’ll takes time. And along with it, your courage drained down, till what’s only left for you is tears. So you cry. And cry, and cry. Till you’re eyes swollen and your tears are gone. Yet still the pain is still there.
When this happens, you’ll need to:
Learn to amend yourself. Even if the world look down on you, seeing you as a mess. You need to realize, you are a human. They are a human. We all are human. And human are meant to make mistakes. Even how perfectionist we tried to be. All of us makes mistakes, in doing things, seeing things, differentiate things. Cause we are different, from one another, And some people describe it as ‘a flaw’, but i prescribe it as ‘a gift’. Just wondering how plain and unexciting the world will be if we all are the same. Same face, same taste, same color, same way of thinking, same reaction, same same same and everything is predictable.
And recounter your sadness with your good moments you’ve attained in life, your goodness, your loved ones, families, friends, to build your strength back. Your life is definitely thousand times better and worth your gratefulness rather than your sorrow over one little mistake. Face it that everything happens with a reason. There’s always morals and benefits behind every bad things occurred. Maybe not now, later or maybe you won’t even realize it. He have planned it all from the beginning, as a Muslim, it is parts of Qada’ and Qadar.
Believe me, I’ve feel it, and i know it sucks. Maybe mine and yours are different. And if I’m in your shoes, maybe I also still can’t get over it. Or maybe I won’t. But you know what, if you’re in my place, you’ll probably won’t make it like I’ve done. Because you know why, as two separate souls, our strength, capability and gifts are different. That’s how human system works, we’re made to compliment each others not stereotyping others. As He stated in the holy Qur’an;
“Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear..”(Qur’an, 2:286)
That’s why your challenges and hardships in life, is yours and only you know how to ace it. Deep inside you’ll know what to do. Seek you inner heart and connect it to Allah. Present to Him you purest intention at the 3/4 of the night and if its His will, you’ll achieve His guidance and emotionally peace. Straighten up your back and move on. For the pain, you’ll probably won’t forget it and it’ll haunts you at first, from time to time, until you’ve become numb to it. But later, it is the one that’ll be the core to your new strength
You’re failure is you’re strength in the future. Embrace it though it’s embarrassing.